Comments (Page 294)

I think a conclusion on the JW Site description of most of the species were incorrect was reached a while back. As some of the Sizes are a bit distorted. 

Welcome to the forum.

Please fix you're grammer.

And no being 15 tons does not mean that the mosasaurs is 180 feet long.

possible because most viewrs know more of about velceraptors 

what about cruttlefish

LORD VADER - WOW! That was extremely neat! I am very much enjoying the amount of excellent work you are puttin out as of late! I really felt that the cliffhanger on which you ended your chapter was quite well presented and executed! Excellent work! Thank you so much for taking the time to share this with us! :)

Thanks. It'll be random my when I post these. No set schedule or anything, just whenever.

i missed these.thanks for bringing them back. this is great.

the director knew of deinonycus but wanted velociraptor cause it sounded cooler.

... :( dilo DID NOT HAVE POISON and utahraptor was a LOT smarter. Dilo wasn't that smart. Also try to improve your grammar. I hate what jurassic park has done to people.

great fight. rooting for monolophosaurus, but i knew from the beginning that dilo would win.

I suspected as much. Also, I've looked all over the website, game looks great.

Nice job. Looking forward to more. 

sorry i'll try to fix the pictures if you want to see them sooner then you can look at the website :)

I've heard of the game but I've nerver really paid attention to it. Still, this is pre-alpha footage?! This looks like something the final game would offer!

Very good.

Common misconception: The JP raptors aren't Velociraptors. They're most likely Dienonychus.

I'll have to get that magizene! Thanks for sharing this! :)

Your pictures aren't working for me :(

This game does look interesting though.

haha i like the first paragraph most

XD XD XD

Great start. I'm thinking of starting a series of story starters. I may or may not follow up with a story, i am just doing the prologue for stories and they are for anyone to use if they feel like writing a story but have no ideas. The first story starter will be followed up with a story. Anyway, great start and I can't wait for the chapters.

YAY! TK'S back! the carno had pretty strong feet and legs to hang on, plusit didn't hang on for very long, anyway.

Wooo! Great fight!

I'm not biased at all. :)

Nice.

This was a great fight. Though I'm not sure how the carnotauru hung onto the carno even though it's hands aren't good for that.

This might just be the best new thing I've read in a while that wasn't related to school!  Congrats on the great start, and I'm itching for future chapters!

BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVO! Bravo indeed, I got home from school, read this, it was great! Can't wait!

REX FAN 684 - It is so wonderful to see you once again - even if for only a moment! :)

ANKYBEATSALL2468 - WOW! That was a very involved and excellent battle! I greatly enjoyed the way in which you described the mannerisms and behaviors of the animals you presented within the bounds of your work! Thank you ever so much for taking the time to produce and share this with us! :)

ANKYBEATSALL2468 - I will never let you guys down - I promise! :)

REXFAN!!!!!!

silver falcon, for his advice :), carnosaur (yay! you're back to your old ppic! i like this one more) and dinofights, even though i never knew him. I just really liked his dinnofights. Rexfan was the one who started up my dinosaur instinct again. And mrhappy (lord vader) just for being happy and funny. also tyrant king and alphadino65 for humour (Alphadino65: Ornitholestes, yelling at the top of his lungs: "You nasty t rex! you bully! you... you..." T rex looks at him awkwardly, hearing only little squeaks. Ummm... SPLATT! TK: haha, we both know that if an ornitholestes and t rex ever met who would win *hint hint* ornitholestes and also Something Real for the support

hmm, i don't think das vs tyrannotitan would be a mismatch, that would be a good fight. As for torvo vs giga, torvo is just edmarka, and i believe it was you who wrote edmarka vs giga... and edmarka won?! as for mismatches... diplodocus vs pachycephalosaurus

gallimimus vs utahraptor (x 20)

me vs everyone BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and do they all have to be dinosaurs? if not, then megalodon/any shark/dunkleosteus/liopleurodon/mosasaurus/kronosaurus/tylosaurus vs goldfish

thanks for the advice, guys. i agree, run-on sentences are definitely a problem.

Good fight, although there was still some un-needed detail in there (although I must commend you on trying, there was definitely less). An example of this is your last sentence. Instead of saying "They did their stuff", you could instead say "The male looked at his mate, and he at her. Perhaps this was the beginning of a successful relationship." This also sets it up for a potential continuation of the story, but leaves the reader at a good ending point.

One thing I did spot in this though, where run-on sentences. Sometimes these are okay, but when your story reads like the average tumblr blog, you might have a problem.

I can't stress it enough that going through your story after you think you've finished and fixing anything until you are absolutely positive it is perfect. Then do it again. This will greatly improve your writing, and as you go you'll find that you are making fewer and fewer changes to your original story.

Something else you may want to try is having someone peer-review your paper. I know that many members on the forums would be glad to help you with this, including myself.

Again though, good fight, with some creative kills (Giga crushing a raptor with its neck), and a very interesting way of introducing the fighters (raptor hitch-hiking on the corpse). Keep it up though, and you'll do great.

Edit: And yes, pictures are good.

Yeah, the pictures are good.

Grammar wise, absolutely. You did great. 

and do you like the pictures?

oops. I'll remember that. Was it better than last time?

Nice fight.

Paragraphs are nice. They make it easier to keep track of where you are. 

Good job still. 

what cerato said.